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Thursday, March 29, 2007

Berto and the unicorn

Story By: Randalynn
Illustrations By: Randalynn

Once upon a time, there was a unicorn and a berto. this berto was a freaking awesome kid that liked video games and music. one day, the unicorn decided to accidently get biten by a man eating rabbit and get rabies.The first thing the unicorn saw was the cute berto playing his guitar hero {cause he loves video games and guitar and rocks at both}. So then the unicorn headed to him. With the yucky bubbles and the blood berto knew what do.... run. of course. what else would any one do when you see a unicorn with rabies?!? ok the only person that wouldnt run is chuck norris... but thats a different story... ok. well the unicorn gets berto cornered and starts taunting him.
sure its ok... he can take it... he has little fear until....

the unicorn pulls out a fork!!! o god not the fork! berto thinks of plans in his head... ah ha!!!
the plan takes place behind our high tech, state of the art censored dust cloud... he turns into a south park character...which we know are immortal... and somehow receives a sword... and kills the unicorn of rabies. we are not allowed to let out information of the event but by the body it seems the unicorn was punched, sliced, and stabbed with his own weapon.
the unicorn's body was found a few days later and now we are looking for the murderer. if you have any information please call...
1-800-murderers of unicorns
{1-800-6874377 63 86426767}


hahahahahaha what a wonderful story eh? hahahahaha love ya berto!!!
Amor Siempre {Love Forever}
Randalynn
ps randi rocks and did this all in stupid little paint....heck yes!

Hexagon minus two equals square


Ummm... well me being dumb... thats what I have to say about that. I went 25 days being single to be unsingle for 3 days... basically. Im out of the love "hexagon" {as of the blog from yesterday}. Well I know people are just gonna ask what happened... well it was me. {and Berto this isnt meant to hurt you or anything... I heart you} I just didnt feel like being that close to Berto. He's my best friend and I liked it that way. And I kinda just need to have alone time still.
This is the third 'cycle' of the little friend group dating... and I started being in this one. And if you think about it... me and Neil are the only ones that were in all three cycles. Now its just Neil. Quite honestly this cycle of love isnt going to include me in it. Back to Randi liking guys a little and flirting a lot. O... and swim camp... yay for being single. Its in like 87 days and Im way excited!!! ahhhh!!! haha.
Well ya... thats all I have to say on the subjects.
Amor Siempre {Love Forever}
Randalynn

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Love sent me a postcard...


Just kidding... I guess love isnt on vacation anymore like me and my Britta announced.
It seems to be back cause of the love "hexagon" as i've heard it been called. ahhh im going to draw the love "hexagon" hahaha so this week has been a week of randi being awesome on paint... lets see if they will work...
well this sucks. i have a unicorn playing guitar and then the unicorn attacking berto then another with the unicorn with a fork. haha. so you should see these. i have them on my myspace page. under the albums "Unicorns" hahah i love them and you should comment them

well this week as been... interesting. i get a boyfriend... my dad tells me to look for cars to show him {like he's gonna buy me one}... neil and i talk again without any awkward-ness atleast i dont think so... even though these happy events happen... im going though my weird depression phase. i hate it and i feel like i hate the world. some people know about the things im going though... just probably two or three know. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i dunno. just problems with me...
love might go on another vacation... and it might just forget to send a postcard this time

Amor Siempre {Love Forever}
Randalynn

ps. no quiero la nieve... quiero la primavera!! {i dont want snow... i want spring!}
cause the snow sucks and this march seems like it when in like lamb out like a lion

Sunday, March 25, 2007

Stand Inside Your Love

So just about everyone knows how good sunday was...
So ya... this song is that song that is pretty much the best song in the entire world and makes me happy and smile a lot... like that one kid that smiles now...haha

Stand Inside Your Love
Smashing Pumpkins
You and me
Meant to be
Immutable
Impossible
It's destiny
Pure lunacy
Incalculable
Insufferable
But for the last time
You're everything that I want and ask for
You're all that I'd dreamed
Who wouldn't be the one you love
Who wouldn't stand inside your love
Protected and the lover of
A pure soul and beautiful you
Don't understand
Don't feel me now
I will breathe
For the both of us
Travel the world
Traverse the skies
Your home is here
Within my heart
And for the first time
I feel as though
I am reborn
In my mind
Recast as child and mystic sage
Who wouldn't be the one you love
Who wouldn't stand inside your love
And for the first time
I'm telling you how much I need and bleed for
Your every move and waking sound
In my time
I'll wrap my wire around your heart and your mind
You're mine forever now
Who wouldn't be the one you love and live for
Who wouldn't stand inside your love and die for
Who wouldn't be the one you love
Love always and forever,
Your Randalynn

Friday, March 23, 2007

Randi {is going crazy}

So last weekend was basically the best weekend of my life... Friday school was so so slow but became one of the funniest nights ever! Laser tagging with the rest of our huge preference group of 16 people... pretty crazy... but i seem to have more fun when there are more of my friends around. {thanks everyone!!! you guys all rock!!!} anyways... just about everyone that is reading this you were there or have already heard about that... except one part. ok so a while back tyler said that i owed him a dance or he owed me one... i cant remember. anyways... i saw him there and later on i realized he left. dang :(. so the last song comes on and i end up dancing with berto's tie... haha yes his tie {which i later found out was tyler's tie... haha} so anyways... i hear tyler say "can i steal her" :D i was so happy... hehe. so i got to dance with him the half of that last song... yay. so that made my night... and everyone knows what happened afterwords.. and if you dont.. well.. go to hannah's,.... she said basically everything about that night.

so any who... sunday, me and berto went for our sunday drive then went to lunch then to berto's house. lets just say... his bed is warm and he is a good cuddler..haha... o and smashing pumpkins rock. hahaha so ya like 7 hours of just laying in his bed... watching pumpkins, talking, kinda sleeping...ya.

monday... i once again hang with berto till 3ish and we go over to trent williams house for a halo party. hahah the ratio was in my favor!!! i was the only girl even there {and got my @$$ kicked by everyone! but hey atleast i played} so ya. there were like 15+ guys there. but the only ones i really knew where jimi spiva berto tyler mike trent and jimi's brother tyler. so ya. after that we {me tyler spiva berto jimi and mike} went to taco bell/KFC and ate yummy food. then i had the brillant idea to go to the park. so we did where they played frisbee with my flip flops. haha and spiva stole them and put them on the baseball fences. i dunno what really happen but when spiva came down i was almost punching him and i ended up on the ground hitting my head on the hard dirt... ouchy. so ya that was monday... {o and haha i made jimi give me a real hug hah}

tuesday... nothing epic... i dunno. i got a real job as a lifeguard at the pool if thats epic... not really

wednesday... region band which we got all 1's {very good by the way} woohoo band {sarcasim}...guitar club which i left soon after it started... soccer game {good job wasatch!}... and then work... lame

thursday... i had someone tell me they like me... i guess thats two now? ahhh this is where im going crazy. its not the issue of this person liking me... i love him to death. but its that other kid... that i like... i dunno. im thinking of just not liking anyone cause he likes someone... and im fine with it... i love him to death too. but they are both like my best friends and i wouldnt want anything to happen that any of us would hate each other... ahhhhhhhhh

friday... i have work later. just sitting here doing nothing till then. just alot of thinking. about... stuff. i dunno.

saturday... if anyone wants to hang out i can. i have to go to a band thing but thats at like 8 in the morning i have to be there... lame core. just call me or text me if you want to. ill probably be cleaning till anyone does.

Love always and forever
Randalynn

ps. Im a lame face... so is Berto. hahaha love ya Berto!

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

I love....

Being with all my friends
Eating ice cream
Singing songs you havent heard forever
Attempting to sing and thinking you sound good
Playing guitar
Having a text waiting for you when you wake up
Driving to fun music
The adreniline rush right before a race
Taking guys on a date
^Not letting them pay... haha
Watching movies
Being held in his arms
Having dark chocolate with coffee
Liking the guy you never thought you would
Gritton's biology class
Guitar club
When he whispers... i love you
Being promised a date
Walking around the mall
Falling asleep in the couches in the mall
Sunday drives with Berto
Laziness day with Berto
Finding out you and him are a lot alike
Hanging with your best friends
Having the ratio in your favor...haha
Being happy
Swimming
Football
Softball
"Inviting" guys in on the first date
Spending time with my family
Dressing up
^Apparently looking amazing
Kissing in the rain
When he kisses you first
^When he kisses you to tell you who he likes
Watching Finding Nemo
Playing Kelly Clarkson
Learning new songs on the guitar
When people listen to me and Im complainy and even sometimes crying
Seeing him happy
Having wonderful dreams
Thinking I found the love of my life
Getting money
Finding out who sings the song you have known forever but never knew who it was
Telling him who i like... and its him
^Telling them you like someone and that you know who likes them... double the fun
^^Finding out he kinda likes you too
Getting phone calls because they miss you
Making i love... lists
I love staying my friends all night
^When they say werid things cause its like one in the morning
Ice cream cones
Talking to someone on the phone till you both fall asleep
Talking on the phone while they fall asleep
Laying under my willow tree watching the clouds
^The thought of someone joining me...
Seeing the places you love
The warmth of the sun with a few cool breezes
Falling asleep on the boat in the sun
Taking walks.. holding his hand
Camping with my family
Playing with my dog
Arguing who is "more amazing"
Feeling all grown up
Talking to someone till the latest hours
Attempting to pull an all nighter
ok ill stop now... but one more................
tyler....
:D tons of love always and forever
Randalynn

Thursday, March 15, 2007

Eight Days

You love him
It is no doubt
Love him more than I did
Never let it run out

Its hard for me to see
All of this happen oh so fast
It was only eight days
But it has to go in the past

I tried to get him back
But it would just hurt you more
I didnt want to take him
Like I already did before

They arent glares I promise
Its just really hard to see
Not jealously or hatred
But memories back with me

I want you guys to be happy
Even if Im not
I try everything
So he can be forgot

My love for him will never fade
But soon my desire will
Just make him happy as can be
This you shall fulfill


Britta... I love you both with all my heart.
I dont want this to be something that will hurt either of you...
Poems just seem one of the best ways I can tell people how I feel.
Make him happy...

Monday, March 12, 2007

Berto's Poem

Berto is basically
The koolest person alive
You can always talk to him
Even on the Sunday drive

Nathaniel said he had panda hair
Which isnt even true
Berto hates that...
But i guess not Blink 182

Berto is the bestest friend
In the entire world
I hope he'll have to owe ice cream
....dang nothing rhymes with world


That was another happy poem....hehe... i love you berto!!! hahaha

Tons of love forever and always
{Happy} Randalynn

ps. I edited this for berto's sake. sorry berto.... i just suck at life like that

My Happy Poem

So Erin made a poem... and I am kinda happy now... so here it is...

Last weekend started crappy
Nothin else to describe that
My world torn apart
And I was the biggest brat

You took me on a 'date'
I thought it was quite nice
The night all seemed
Perfect and precise

You made it better
When I got upset
You would do someting
To just make me forget

I started to like you
And everyone could see
You wouldnt believe the smile
When you said 'and ends in andi'

I hope this doesnt get awkward
I hope it never ends
But if it does, I hope you'll be
One of my best friends...

{Pretty much... thats all I got.}

Tons of love forever and always...
Randalynn

Friday, March 9, 2007

Randi {is happy}

So this week was 1685132457425468135155125 times better than last week. A week ago {probably to the hour...} i was still crying over who i thought was 'the love of my life' but im pretty sure he was meant to be my best friend and thats it. being with him taught me all of that. so basically me and him having been talking more and more through out the week and its made me happier than ever. i can flirt and have one of my best friends back. and apparently i am a huge flirt... cause people think they know who is my question mark. {opposite from last time... this time the question mark is the one being liked... not the one that liked somone} so ya. jeb, hannah, and erin guessed. and i heard britta was kinda guessing with erin.

well im not going to lie. but you are the only ones that can speak of it...............you were right

that didnt last long. dang i suck. but i dunno. it might end up being nothing. he likes someone...
and your probably reading this at this very moment {well.... if your a girl that is...} Im going to take it slow and all.. and be normal of course... :D... i love being single.... hahahahaha

Tons of love forever and always...
Randi

ps the greatest thing you'll ever learn, is just to love and be loved return....

Wednesday, March 7, 2007

Not really anything...

So Britta said I am a fun blogger cause i blog everyday but this one will probably have no value but thats ok cause thats basically what blogs are. haha. so anyways. today was good. school was like usual but it was even day so i had geometry, art, health, and biology.. all easy and i love biology. not only that buts the first wednesday of the month... meaning. GUITAR CLUB!!! yay! o man and my Ty Ty came. I was excited. While lurpe taught britta.... i taught ty ty since you've been gone cause it just rocks like that...

Umm so Erin... we arent slapping anyone for liking anyone yet are we? Holy crap... ive been single for a week {tomorrow} and i slightly like someone {slightly slightly slightly but ya} ill be his question mark... hahah suckers. but im pretty bad at keeping my own secrets from everyone. Ok so ya... Erin... I promise i wont get committed yet. Maybe after swim camp? haha ok. Well... ya. Thats all...

Tons of love forever and always...
Randi

Ps. Today I have lived in Heber for 4 years now... woohoo... i guess

Tuesday, March 6, 2007

Smiling today

Today was a good day... it could be better but i cant complain after all that has been going on lately. So i dont have to go to school at first. I get to go to the middle school for the combined concert thing. O woohoo for me. But hey... a break of school... on a tuesday? Count me in. So its me berto and mike. From 8 till around 11. So then I hear that we are excused from 5th period. so woohoo. 11-12:25 more break from school? okay!

so we dont know where else to go so we go to berto's house to play guitar hero and such. so we stayed there till about 12 and finally went to school. had lunch. which was great cause me and neil talked and threw things at each other. o and i choked on a rice crispy treat cause neil put the whole thing in his mouth so i wanted to see if i could. bad idea. one: i have a really really small mouth. two: i cant breathe from my nose. haha and i didnt rememeber those things till it was all the way in my mouth. stupid me. hahaha so ya

then after school as fun. me and neil still talked and stuff.. hehe. {i like this 'lets be friends' i get to talk to him yet still flirt or hug or anything whenever..} so ya i realize i have no one to take me home.. hmmm... so then i start to call my dad and my dad was being a jerk and such. so neil said he'd take me home... ok. so it wasnt awkward or anything, it was fun. he kept singing funny and driving crazy. and i did the erin... "you crazy" haha. and when we got to my house... it wasnt like i forced myself to not kiss him. i was totally fine. just said "well thanks for the ride.. ill talk to you later i guess" haha and the highlight of my day so far... "if im at the concert... you'll see me" hahahaha i love that kid. basically just like my best friend now. that was quick. well ya. we do have an evening performance tonight at 6 so if your reading this and it hasnt happen already... you should come.

Tons of love forever and always,
Randi

Monday, March 5, 2007

One Day I'll Fly Away

I follow the night
Can't stand the light
When will I begin to live again
One day I'll fly away
Leave all this to yesterday
What more could your love do for me
When will love be through with me
Why live life from dream to dream
And dread the day when dreaming ends
One day I'll fly away
Leave all this to yesterday
Why live life from dream to dream
And dread the day when dreaming ends
One day I'll fly away
Fly fly away...
Most of the time I really want to just fly away. But my best friends keep me on the ground....
I love you all... and I'll try to promise this will be the last blog thats kinda about last weekend.
One more thing from Moulin Rouge {if you couldnt already tell}
Feelings I can't fight!
You're free to leave me but
Just don't deceive me!
...And please believe me when I say
I LOVE YOU!
Tons of love, forever and ever,
Randi

Sunday, March 4, 2007

The Weekend Ends...

Im glad this weekend is gone... Ive lost the person I loved most, got mad at some of my best friends, cryed a freaking ton, and learned a lot about me...

First... I want this... Britta... Im sorry Im a bitch. Im selfish and didnt want to be hurt... so I guess I hurt you. Just seeing you be so close with Neil, it makes me weird. I dont even know how to explain this. I love him. I love you. I care about you both too much... and I didnt want me and him to be apart. I still dont know what happened, I dont think anyone does. I dont hate you one bit. Im sorry for everything this weekend...

For the day me and him got together... I learned today, that I hurt probably three people that day. Britta... I learned you liked him then today. Jeb... I was even trying to get you guys together and I fell for him. And Nathaniel... I told you I wasnt going for Jake or Neil, and what do I do a month later?

I hate this all. Ive lost 6 pounds in the last two weeks and hate eating. Sleeping is crappy as can be. My 4.0 ever this year probably just slipped from my fingers. I started hating people for no reason at all. I got dumped and no one knows why. Sunday drives releive a lot of stress. I need a pool... i would go in the morning but no one would take me.

I love Neil.. more than anything in the world. I would do anything just to have him in my arms again... to see his big blue eyes right by me... to do the rage drum part while holding his hand... to just hear his car turn the corner and know he's coming... to have a lurpey hug right after school... to have someone that would walk me to spanish... to have someone to hold while watching a movie... to teach me guitar... to be really silly whenever we wanted... to see him smile every morning that he picked me up... to laugh like it was 2 in the morning... to have someone that wouldnt let me fall... to have him blow water in my face...to text me saying cute goodnights... to kiss my nose... to go exploring... to have him say...I love you. I know I have to move on but its going to be hard to let him go...

Tons of love, Forever and ever,
Randi

Things I've learned this sucky week...

  • Crying makes my eyes go blue
  • Crying too hard makes it hard to breathe but increases abs
  • Being miserable makes it hard to eat, sleep, move, and to focus
  • Being pisted off makes it so all you want to do is eat and throw things
  • Don't truely trust the people that still have the ability to hurt you...
    ...cause they can and most likely will
  • Find the friends that you can depend your life on
  • Everything happens for a reason
  • Dancing to the Moulin Rouge soundtrack solves a lot
  • 200 IM are great for an upset person
  • My parents actually cared about this break up and Im happy they care
  • The truest friends will say what they think, not what you want them to say
  • Id rather have the truth than be ignored
  • I know who question mark is... and no one told me
  • Trying to get him back is harder than just moving on
  • But seeing him with one of you best friends is even harder
  • You could have the best day in forever yet be miserable seeing them

Saturday, March 3, 2007

I wish it was different...

You made me happy
Like no one else could
You treated me wonderful
Like every guy should

Things went wrong
I dont know what
But I ended it there
And there we were shut

6 months
28 days
I wish it was different
In so many ways


One month later
I'm in your arms
I dont know why
But you've got the charms

Our ex'es are upset
But we still went on
The last thing I wanted
Was for you to be gone

We played around
And had our fun
But all of a sudden
It seemed you were done

5 months
13 days
I wish it was different
In so many ways


~To Nathaniel and Neil
The ones that are gone, And the ones I loved

Things That Remind me of....Tyler

helium balloons
'im gunna!'
2 1/2 of randi!
{^more to love^}
#2 in my heart...
'this never leaves the van'
finding nemo
We Danced Anyway
helium hangover
guitar hero
Aqua Teen Hunger Force
halo
"thats what she said"
Days
freebird
wild hogs

Friday, March 2, 2007

Worst Day of my Entire life {Part 2}

So ya i couldnt really finish the story last time cause its long and cause i couldnt really handle it and such. so ya here is part 2: {if you havent read the one below this... do that before reading this and it would make more since!!!}

So i get home, nervous as i can be. I start thinking that instead of just kissing him on the cheek, i should have stayed with him and asked him what was wrong... it might have saved the night. But i didnt. So im sittin at home, watching tv with my mom. I get a text around 3:30, from Neil saying, "so i lied when i said it was just lack of sleep. i've been thinking about us i just dont know if its working out. i do love you but its changed from wanting to be with you constantly to something else. Im sorry if this hurts you but i cant do this anymore. i do love you though, from the bottom of my heart and i really hope we'll still be friends. i hope you can someday forgive me for this." well just sittin on my couch i wanted to just start crying... but nope. i held it in. i went to my front porch and texted erin asking her if she would come get me. but lucky me, she was on her way to the dentist. woohoo.

so i went to my room and got on the computer trying to find ways not to cry. and trying to make it so it didnt seem like i was a jerk, i texted him back. but im pretty sure i was being a jerk about it. i asked him why he didnt just tell me and why he would lie to me like that. he had been ignoring me all day making me feel pretty much invisible. so this was all said and he just said that he's not a man enough to see me sad because of him and such.

finally around 4:45 erin and laurie came and got me. i got in the car and erin started saying, "your boyfriend is abusive!!!" or something like that. and brillant me just says, "i dont have a boyfriend." instantly erin looks around to me... and laurie starts to floor the gas. we sit down in her living room. we start talking about him and suddenly i can feel the tears coming. o no. i even told them that i dont cry... but thats kind of a lie. the truth is that i dont cry in front of people. my face goes bright red and puffy when i cry. We all decide that i need to text him back saying something good. so here is our creation... "my love for you will never fade but my desire will. thank you so much for the last 5 months. i know you are right and we do need this. i am hurt, but im not angry. i love you"

the best reply ive gotten ever from a guy that was just my boyfriend an hour ago... and it was his. "thank you. it means so much to me that your angry of something." i dont know why. but it made me {semi}happy when i read that.

Laurie and Erin then invited me to go see 'The Forginer' {dont know if thats right} at the high school. they even said that Neil was coming but i said i'd be fine. I got front seat. We got britta then Neil. We had one of those strange eye contacts... that i soon ended. Then got jess and headed to the high school. It was like britta and neil had magnets... {not saying i dont love you britta, i know your one of his best friends!!! and no matter what i say in this...im not mad!} I sat next to britta and erin. {neil being on the other side of britta} so the play was great... except when neil and britta would start poking or something. all that did is just remind me he was there. i loved the play... it was great. {and ya me and neil talked a bit, he acted like nothing had happen... like we were just friends again}

Going home has pretty much bleh. Erin and Britta sat between me and neil in the back seat. and what song comes on? lips of an angel... great. song that reminds me of nathaniel and neil. just what i needed. neil starts singing it with his fairy dancing {haha}. but it wasnt haha for me last night... i almost started crying and im pretty sure Erin saw that.

When home, i told my parents i was there and went to my room. Pretty much as soon as i shut the door i started bawling. Pretty much the worst moment of my life. Unable to breathe, talk, move, do anything... i just lie on the floor... {ya i couldnt even make it to my bed} so i finally settle down a bit and get msn. right as i get logging on, berto calls me...and im still crying. but i didnt want to ignore him so i answered. he asked me if i was ok and that i didnt seem like it that day. i told him i would tell him what was going on on msn cause i was about to log on. so ya.we talked about a bunch a stuff. meanwhile im texting laurie cause she was telling me how good i did at the play and such. so around 10:20 erin texts me saying, "come to your front door...." so i look out my window and their car pulls up. i go to the door, sobbing and look like a total mess... there my gardian angels have a pint of ben and jerrys and an awesome card that sings 'i will survive' {and the batteries are already almost dead. haha} so they give hugs and leave. i get back to berto and talk till about 11:30 or so and attempt to sleep. i turn on moulin rouge cd that erin gave me earlier and lie down. jake texts me and we talk till about midnight. i listen to 'come what may' , 'someday ill fly away' and 'elephant love melody' over and over again till i got sick of turning it back to them. i listened to just most of the cd till i feel asleep and ended the worst day, and started the second worst day....

i love you all. you mean so much to me. im sorry this is long. but some of you i know wanted to know the whole story... thats pretty much MOST of it. {around 89% haha} but im better today. still sad and hurt... but ill be ok. {extra love to the ones that helped me the most though this: Erin, Laurie, Britta, Berto, Tyler, and Jeb} much love! bye

Thursday, March 1, 2007

Worst Day of my Entire Life {Great Way to Start a New Month}

Yes out of all 16 years, 2 months, and 11 days, this was the worst of them all. Well last night i had a nice talk with Nathaniel.. not sarcasim till me, being stupid, asked if there was like any chance of us being together ever again. and he got mad at me and said i should be acting like i have a boyfriend instead of asking him that stuff and saying that i was lucky that lurpe puts up with me. and ya so that made me upset. then i was 'diagnosed' with depression by britta {not just my soul owner but my life saver} then i didnt get like any sleep.

then i wake up with a sore throat and such not wanting to go. well i get ready as normal and 7:30 comes. lurpe... no no no... today he is neil. neil pulls up in the drive way and i get in the car to go to school. Instantly i think that nathaniel told neil something and something was up. we didnt talk, we barely looked at each other. when we got there, we started walking to the school when he turns around and was like 'crap' like he forgot his wallet or something. so i walked slow waiting for him, when he came back he looked at me weird like i should have just kept walking. in the cafateria {cant spell} he basically wanted nothing to do with me. jake even asked me if i wanted to sit by him and scooched over for me. and i said 'he seems not to want to be with me...' so then he asks neil, 'do you wanna sit by your girlfriend?' 'meh' he said. so i went and sat by erin and britta. they knew about the nathaniel conversation so ya. the day went on, me being miserable. i texted him asking him if he was ok and all he said is that he was just really tired. no lunch. school ended. and did the usual go to the place where we always go. neil barely talked to me. i gave him a hug but it seemed like he was avoiding me. and usually the 'home time' is like 3. today went to 3:20 and seemed like hours {really it was almost one hour but ok} we take berto's to his sisters house and then go to my house. i look at him and usually he just puts it in park to say goodbye, but today he looked at me weird then put it in park. i went to kiss him and he backed away. i kinda tried again. but nope. 'i love you' i said. 'i know' he replyed. i kissed him on the cheek and left. i felt terrible walking up the drive way not really knowing that'd be the last time id ever kiss him...
To be continued....